Letter to my father....Tel-Aviv May 03 2001-His name was John T Sereny d.o.b. Feb 21 1927

What a fucking asshole.
There are days when I wish my dad was so fucking dead.
He is a miserable mean vile fuelled ugly human specimen.
Treats people like shit and hurts my feelings constantly.
In the face of all that stress I still instinctively love him.
But somehow I feel like I love him less and less as time goes by.
I want to be able to yank the poison from his eyes and send it to the depths of hell for a good solid burn.
A burn of death and crawling and destruction forever of this terrible disease.
When he advised me that he had sold the hockey tickets, a huge piece of me was once again ripped off.
I now realize as I write, but he didn't probably do it because of malice but out of the greed driven dementia in which he lies.
Money is the last bastion of his power.
He thinks he can make people roll over and play dead by making so much money.
Many people will jump at his will because of the power of money, but most now see him as the old fool which he really is.
A sick demented old fart with no life, no love except music, no friends, no real family because they'd rather avoid him than be with him.
A very sad ending to a life that wasn't made up of many miracles, outstanding stories, feats of undeserving unbelievable bravery, marks of genius and sadness as deep as the ocean.
Today, thank God, I have an opportunity to let out a little bit of my own pain towards him.
It's very deep in me and has been covered up by years of drugs, booze, jokes and food. Wow what a fun combo, they should market it @ Wendy's !!!